Coping with Sleeplessness After Bringing Home a Premature Baby from the NICU

Question

How can parents effectively manage sleeplessness, stress, and fear after bringing home a premature baby from the NICU?

Answer 1

Breastfeeding is hard

For all the talk about how "natural" breastfeeding is, nothing quite prepares you for the feeling of being a complete and total failure as a mother quite like having trouble with breastfeeding. It's not easy, you don't "naturally" know exactly how to hold the baby, and he doesn't "naturally" know how to latch on. If your baby latches on easily and doesn't have trouble feeding, feel lucky. My wife had problems with all 3 of our kids because they each needed different techniques for feeding.

Your hospital should have access to a lactation counselor, or you can hunt down your local La Leche League chapter. If you're having any trouble at all, get in contact with them -- they can help.

(Late Edit) Another thing about breastfeeding: Don't worry or feel bad if mom can't produce enough milk to keep up with what baby demands. Just supplement with formula (or switch to it altogether if you have to), and don't let anyone make you feel bad about it.

Answer 2

One thing to remember is that some babies cry more than others, and the amount of crying doesn't necessarily reflect on how well/poorly you are doing as a parent. At least for their first few months, no amount of picking up and calming the child is going to spoil them, so I would definitely recommend doing so when you can (as opposed to the "let them cry it out approach"). However, if you're feeling overwhelmed, just remember that it is ok to put your child down and let them cry for a few minutes while you take a break and collect yourself. In the grand scheme of things, they will never remember that you "deserted them" for 15 minutes, and doing so is definitely much better than getting angry with your child or having a nervous breakdown.